Pain, Grace, Gain & Change - How to deal with Pain without Reliving the Experience. By Esther Simeon8/22/2013 ![]() You don’t have to be over 30, 40 or 50 to realize that life sometimes comes with some level of pain. Pain can be in form of painful memories, childhood trauma or events, neglect, rejection, abuse, disappointment, betrayal, loss and much more. Any of these can happen to a child, a teenager, an adult, man or woman, a boy or a girl. We live in an imperfect world, however when we experience any of these unpleasant events how do we prevent them from holding us captive, how do we prevent past traumas from assaulting our minds and emotions and from holding our lives captive? There is one common ground for all people nobody wants to experience pain, if given a choice people will run from painful experiences as far as possible. Although most people can live a relatively normal life without being constantly aware, reminded or feel any emotional pain, however an unpleasant event can trigger a downward spiral of what was otherwise the perfect picture on the outward, resulting in emotional outburst, pain, and cries especially for women. Pain can result in anger, regrets, sorrow, looking for someone or something to blame for the pain, some people could even go as far as planning a revenge to inflict pain on others, this is clearly not the right approach to dealing with pain. Pain If something happen, that triggers the memory of a very painful past experience, rather than dive right in to the memory of the past and relive the painful experience in your mind. Take a quick five seconds count to snap out of that emotional state of pain, quickly remind yourself, it could have been worse, you are alive today by the grace of God. This is not denying the existence of the pain, but this is allowing you to keep things in perspective, take control over your emotional state, and not to relive the pain nor give in to the emotions and memory of it. Grace Quickly move from Pain into Grace. Grace is unmerited favor, unmerited forgiveness, unmerited mercy, unmerited unconditional love. Moving into grace means that rather than feeling angry and resentful towards the person or thing you held responsible for your pain, you allow the grace of God to wash over you. Then you release grace, mercy and forgiveness to others. You can even say what Jesus said “Father forgive them for they know not what they were doing”. This gives you a sense of power and control over your emotions. Gain Moving from Pain to Grace to Gain. Analyze the Gain. Whenever we experience something painful, we become more sensitive in that area and we are quick to identify others who may be suffering what we have experienced in the past and overcome. Hence we gain more sensitivity, discernment, compassion, understanding, wisdom, caution and much more as a result of the painful experience. The stage of analyzing gain is very important to see something good about yourself as a result of the past painful experience. Whatever was meant for evil against you, God turned it around for your good; keep this in mind and rest assured. Change Changing our response to pain is very important. Rather than relive the past, we can identify the fact that we are not the same person who was subjected to that abuse, we have moved on, we are not the child that was molested, we are now a grown up adult able to make our own decision, we are not the same. When the feelings, emotions and memory tries to trap and tie you to the past, repeat the 4 steps, Pain, Grace, Gain & Change. Then make a few minutes to pray prayers of affirmations & requests. Prayer: I pray for the healing power of God to flow through me, heal my heart and mind, heal my memory, heal me in every single area, where there was emotional wounds. Jesus came to heal the broken hearted and to bind up their wounds. I pray for the balm of Gilead and the healing anointing of Jesus Christ to flow into every deep path of my heart, mind, memory, spirit, soul and body, on the conscious and subconscious layers. I release total forgiveness to the people who hurt me. Jesus you died for all past, present and future sins, so I release and forgive all the past present and future sins of the people or person that hurt me. I will no longer be held captive or prisoner to past events. I pray and make this request through the name of Jesus Christ. Amen Affirmations: I am not my past, I refuse to live in the past, I am free from every pain of the past, I am released from every pain of the past, I forgive and release the offenders, I release myself from every hurt, wounds, and anger; I disengage with habitual negative memory recall, I will not live in the past, I have a great life now, I focus on my life as it is now and the future. Jesus experienced pain on every level imaginable. He had the sins and the penalty of the sin of the whole world placed on his shoulder, not only for the sins committed up to the point of his death and resurrections, but all past, present and future sins were carried by Him to the cross. If he only died for all sins up to the time of his death and resurrection, you and I will not have any hope of forgiveness, but because His sacrifice extend beyond the past present future and eternity, you and I and the people yet to be born, have hope of a savior, healer, forgiver, and a restorer. Key Points Pain = Acknowledge the Pain without reliving the experience Grace= Receive Grace and Release Grace Gain= You are a better Person, Wiser, Smarter, More sensitive, Discerning and much more Change= Choose your response to pain sensation. Change from victim to a victor Conclusion Pain has to be dealt with on several levels: Spiritual level, Psychological level, Emotional level, and Physiological level. This article is an introduction to subject of dealing with Pain, I plan to release other articles, journals, book and training manuals that will address this topic in more depth. How to handle a serial offender, bully or abuser Sometimes we find it difficult to forgive a repeat offender, because even though you forgive this person, they somehow keep repeating the actions knowingly or unknowingly that hurts you. So this is like a vicious cycle. In such instances it’s important to develop a ‘thick skin’ carefree, water off the duck back approach, and totally minimize the words or actions of the offender. Hence you gain the power back, by refusing to be a victim and begin to develop the mentality of a victor, who is smarter, wiser and more powerful than the bully. Another approach is direct communication, without shouting or emotional outbursts, you state clearly and objectively what the repeated abuser is doing that hurt you, how their action made you feel, and request that they change their action. Direct communication should only be attempted in cases where you do not feel physically threatened or in danger. If this approach fail to work, choose to forgive them personally, and make attempt to remove yourself from the abusive situation. Since every situation is completely different, one method may not work in all situations. However if you feel you are continuously been subject to abuse, you should seek personal professional counsel to deal with the situation.
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![]() The God of all comfort has promised to protect you. There are so many chapters, events, seasons and stories in each of our individual lives. Each seasons or events can be compared to the writing of a novel with different chapters, some chapters flows smoothly to the next chapter, while others are not as smooth flowing; some chapters leaves you with a sense of anticipation or suspense which keeps you guessing what next! One thing that is solid, stable, firm and unwavering, in the midst of lives seasons and changes, is the unconditional love of the Father God. Isaiah 43:2 When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. God indeed promise us that He will never leave us or forsake us no matter what! God is not looking for reasons to discard of you like a toilet paper; you are of greater value than that! You are made in image and likeness of God. How many of you will disown your children at the slightest mistake? Some may, but most people would not, neither will God. Amazingly God promised to never leave you or forsake, He is your heavenly daddy. The book of Isaiah 43:2 reveal another love letter and promise of the Father to us His children, and I want us to personalize and meditate upon it, until this promise sinks deep into our conscious and subconscious mind. Isaiah 43:2 When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. God said when I walk through the water, He will be with me. It is me and Jesus walking on the water, I am not alone, I will not sink, I will not perish, I will not be destroyed, I cannot be destroyed, I am in Christ, Christ is in me, In Him I live, In Him I move, In Him I have my total being and existence. All my life and existence is in God, I am submerged and surrounded with God’s unfailing love, I am indestructible. I am shielded and protected under the shadow of the Almighty God. God is real to me, God is more real than the invisible air that I breathe, I believe that God is with me, God’s presence surrounds me, I have more faith in God and in His presence than in anything else. I am a spirit being, I am a made in the image and likeness of God, God is a Spirit, I am a spirit, I have a soul, and I live in this body. I am who God said that I am, I am what God create me to be, I have what God said that I have, I have the grace and favor of God on my life and family always. When I walk through the rivers, they will not overflow me. The God of Abraham Isaac and Jacob is walking with me. The same way God walked with the children Israel in the midst of the red sea on dry ground, He is here by my side, making ways where there seems to be no way. The rivers will never ever overflow me, because God is with me. I am saved and protected in God’s loving grace. When I walk through the fire, I will not be burned. I love you Lord, you are a shield around me; you are my glory and the lifter up of my head. You are magnificent, all powerful God. I thank you Jesus for your love that never ever fails. I receive your grace and your mercy in a fresh way, right this moment. I believe and I know that when I walk through the fire, I will not be burned. You are the same God of Shedrach Mesharch and Abnedgo, you proved it that you will keep me safe and protected from harm and dangers. I believe and I receive divine immunity against all dangerous situations and circumstances in Jesus name. The flame will not kindle upon me. I thank you Lord for the blood of Jesus Christ that cover and protect me and my family, no evil will befall me, no plague, disaster or destruction will come near my dwelling place. I thank you Jesus, you are the fourth man in the midst of any fire, therefore fire will NOT burn or kindle upon me. I have divine immunity in Jesus name Thank you Lord for giving your angels charge over me and my family, to watch over us, protect us, defend us and keep us safe. Important Note to readers: God often uses parables and similitude when communicating to us through scriptures. For instance in this scriptural passage above there are references to: water, rivers, and fire. Walking on water signifies walking by faith, walking in the supernatural, walking with Jesus. Waters can also signify treacherous conditions, a storm, like a hurricane. God promise to protect, and keep us in all seasons of life. It is not saying you should step off your balcony into a pool of water attempting to walk instead of swimming or from a ship onto the ocean, it is not saying you should play around with fire or walk through burning buildings. There are natural laws and spiritual laws. No one should deliberately put their lives in danger. It’s always wise to walk in wisdom and caution. This of course does not contradict the fact that God is able to save and protect in all situations. The Assurance of God's Love - You are not an Accident, You are Special to God. By Esther Simeon.7/2/2013 ![]() Over the years and ages, God has made several attempts to communicate to us of His unfailing love for each and every one of us, in so many different ways. One of his primary vehicles of communication has been through the scriptures. Isaiah 43:1 But now thus saith the LORD that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine. When we look at the story of God’s relationship with Abraham and his offspring, we see the demonstration of the unfailing love of a covenant making and a covenant keeping God. The scripture is God’s love letter to humanity, it is timeless, ageless, ever relevant to past present and future; it radiates with the love, life and the power of God. Our understanding of God is primarily based on what we’ve heard or read from the scriptures. Isaiah 43:1 is a love letter from God to us, hence it’s important to personalize it. Here is a prayer of declaration and affirmation, read it, declare it, believe it and experience it. (God said whatsoever you desire when you pray, believe that you receive it, and then you will have it). God created me, I am not an accident, I am perfectly and wonderfully made in the image and likeness of God. God formed me, before I was formed in my mother’s womb God knew me, I am special to God. If God said, fear not, then I have nothing to fear, because I have God the Father, He is watching over me, like a mother will watch over her baby, I am save and secured, I can rest and relax. I am redeemed by God, I not trying to get redeemed, I am already redeemed by God, I am redeemed by the blood of Jesus Christ. God calls me by name, God knows me personally, I am unique and special to God. I have a special place in the heart of God. God is mindful of me. God is thinking about me, I am loved and accepted. My relationship with God is like a love of a father to child relationship, He cares for me, He takes care of me, He provides for me, He protects, defends and watches over me always. He is a loving Father, He never sleeps when He’s watching over His children. (He that watches over Israel shall never slumbers or sleeps) What we say to ourselves is more important than what anyone else says, what we say is a narration of what we believe, and we tend to believe more in what we say and meditate upon. So when it comes to our relationship with a loving Father God; we should practice reading his love letters to us in an empowering and affirmative way. When you do this and it becomes a lifestyle, your sense of safety, assurance, protection, love will increase significantly. You will move from the outer court to the inner court. You will develop a sense of confidence that you can approach God and He will give you, His full 100% attention. You can trust God with the most intimate and personal issues and he will never betray your confidence. You can commune and talk to God in a personal and intimate way, e.g. a silent prayer, a gentle whisper, a simple request for help and guidance, a call for wisdom and much more. You can rely on and trust God, He is faithful; He never ever fails. He is a dependable and reliable Father. You have a place in the heart of God that can never be replaced by anything or anyone else. You are not an accident, you are special to God. |
Esther Simeon
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